Thursday, November 02, 2006

Shakes Fist in Impotent Rage


We didn’t win 1st place in the Halloween decorating contest. I’m a little miffed since we spent quite a bit of time, effort, and money decking out our lawn. We had two giant inflatables: an 8’ purple spider complete with lights and a 5’+ tall globe featuring a lunatic with a knife and a cloud of swirling bats. That’s just the beginning! We had:

  • green webbing spanning the front wall lit with a black light
  • a cackling, light-up skeleton hanging from the tree
  • a black cat staring at the hanging skeleton
  • a skeleton breaking out of the ground with a light-up skull
  • webbing stretching from the tree to the lamppost and all over the front bushes
  • black lights in the lamppost and the front porch light
  • headstones with witty sayings

and the piece de resistance,

  • a machine that spewed fog from underneath the purple spider.

Oh, and numerous small pumpkins gutted by local squirrels, which were almost better than carved jack-o-lanterns. While the effect was cool, it was even funnier to watch Stacy driven to even higher throes of squirrelcide fantasies as she chased them away daily.

I’ll post a link to the HOA Web site once they have the pics of the contenders up. We took 2nd place to our house-decorating nemesis from down the street. They have a nice yard to begin with, but this year they used ghosts, a misting birdbath, a portable flaming brazier, and no less than 13 carved jack-o-lanterns. Apparently, the jack-o-lanterns put them over the top. If that’s what it takes, I’ll be carving pumpkins like mad next year, dammit.

Does anyone have the number to some good pumpkin smashers? Oooh, maybe I can transplant some of our pumpkin-hungry squirrels into their yard.

Fade out to sound of maniacal laughter.